There once was a redhead like me,
Who searched for the best place to be,
1940’s Key West,
Was the home she loved best,
Freda’s island, surrounded by sea.
Freda was my father’s mother, a flame-haired beauty who made her home in Key West for many years. She was a strong, capable woman. I never knew her, but in old photos, she looks a bit like me.
Here I go! Tomorrow morning, I leave for the Keys, via Miami!
The drive of six hours is a breeze,
Then I’ll be in the wonderful Keys,
Where I’ll whip out my pen,
Signing books once again,
For the readers who say “pretty-please.”
Here are the dates of this week’s appearances:
“Because it is Monday, you see,
We are giving away this TV,”
When the game reached its half,
We could not help but laugh,
When the waitperson brought it to me.
For I’ve not owned a set til this day,
And the prize brings me dread and dismay,
Though the gesture was nice,
It’s an evil device,
Do I keep it, or give it away?
Meps’ reaction to winning a TV
On a Monday evening, I met my sister, Julie, at Highlands pub in Eugene, Oregon for a drink and some conversation. As we sat down in the booth, she noticed that there was a TV over her head. “Do you want to switch places?” she asked, knowing that I can’t stand television. “No, it’s high enough that it won’t interfere,” I answered.
Our waiter was a friendly fellow, and at one point, he brought us a couple of cards and pencils. “What’s this?” we asked. “We’re giving away a TV at halftime,” he said. Until then, we hadn’t even noticed that the rest of the patrons were watching Monday Night Football.
I thought it was safe to put my name in the drawing, because I never win anything. Until this time: At halftime, they announced that Meps Schulte was the winner, and the waiter carried a brand-new 32-inch television to our table. Julie and I were practically on the floor, laughing at the irony. I am 100% certain that I was the only person in the place who did not already own a TV.
Sadly, my perfect record of never owning a TV set is now broken. Should I give it away? To do so would increase TV-watching in the world. Or should I keep it to watch Burning Man documentaries, classic movies, and silly cat videos?
What a dilemma! I welcome your suggestions in the comments.
When you get on the dull workday lift,
Where you always give strangers short shrift,
Just this once, say hello,
And then see how things go,
It’s the day to give strangers that gift.
Friday, July 31 is National Talk in an Elevator Day. For Meps, that means San Francisco Talk on the Radio Day, as she’ll be interviewed by KCBS morning anchors Stan Bunger and Susan Leigh Taylor about talking to strangers.
The brief interview is scheduled for 9:30 am PST. You can listen on the internet using the KCBS Live Audio Stream (http://cbssf.com/listen). If you are in the Bay Area, tune into KCBS at 740 AM or 106.9 FM.
For readers who must save a tree,
There’s now an e-Book, and it’s free,
It’s a little bit newer,
And the drawings are fewer,
But you’ll find that it still sounds like me.
The Kindle Edition of Strangers Have the Best Candy is now available! The download is free today, June 28. Since I cannot autograph your Kindle without damaging it, I’m offering an autographed Happy Spot to anyone who downloads the eBook before July 10! Put your request in a comment on this post, and I’ll contact you for the mailing address.
If you have a different type of e-reader, the ePub edition will be available on Smashwords on July 1. If you have a choice, get the Amazon Kindle Edition — it has more illustrations!
Although this edition doesn’t have the full quota of illustrations, the best ones are included. Frank Lloyd Bear and I have also included a teaser for our next book, The Joyful Bear.
For readers who must save a tree,
There’s now an e-Book, and it’s free,
It’s a little bit newer,
And the drawings are fewer,
But you’ll find that it still sounds like me.
The Kindle Edition of Strangers Have the Best Candy is now available! The download is free today, June 28. Since I cannot autograph your eBook, I’m offering an autographed Happy Spot to anyone who downloads the eBook before July 10! Put your request in a comment on this post, and I’ll contact you for the mailing address.
Although this edition doesn’t have the full quota of illustrations, the best ones are included. Frank Lloyd Bear and I have also included a teaser for our next book, The Joyful Bear.
Nick is the creator of the Happy Spot “gang sign,” which is actually a 3D smiley-face
I need more than a simple mouse-click,
I must dash off a limerick, quick,
With this rhyme, I’ll be proud,
To stand out from the crowd,
Who will wish happy birthday to Nick.
It’s fun to write a birthday limerick for my Seattle friend, Nick Blenkush, because he often responds in kind!
I am glad to have worldwide acclaim,
In the self-published, dog-eat-dog game,
It’s my title, thank god,
That is prize-winning odd,
Not my writing, my looks, or my name.
Candy Crushes Competition, from the BBC Entertainment News
I am proud to announce that Strangers Have the Best Candy has just received the Diagram Award for the Oddest Book Title of the Year. There is no cash award, just a “passable bottle of claret” awaiting me in London. The Bookseller hinted that agents and publishers “are tipping it to be the ‘hot book’ at the forthcoming London Book Fair.” I don’t know whether to be excited (if it’s true) or offended that they are making fun of me. The real benefit is seeing my name and title in the news as far away as India and New Zealand.
My favorite headline so far is “Candy crushes competition,” from the BBC Entertainment Live page.
I am glad to have worldwide acclaim,
In the self-published, dog-eat-dog game,
It’s my title, thank god,
That is prize-winning odd,
Not my writing, my looks, or my name.
The BBC ran a teaser with “Candy crushes competition” as the headline
I don’t know whether to be excited or embarrassed.
When The Bookseller announced that Strangers Have the Best Candy has received the Diagram Award for the Oddest Book Title of the Year, they said there was no cash award, just a “passable bottle of claret” awaiting me in London. However, their news release said that agents and publishers “are tipping it to be the ‘hot book’ at the forthcoming London Book Fair.” Is this an example of British humour (sic), or are they serious?
Strangers Have the Best Candy relies
On its title to catch readers’ eyes,
Now the Guardians claim,
That it’s found worldwide fame,
And it might win the Diagram Prize.
I woke up on Saturday to a Google Alert, saying that my name had appeared in The Guardian. “This must be a mistake,” I thought, as I clicked on the link to one of the best-known online news sites in the world. To my surprise, the shortlist had been released for the Diagram Prize for the Oddest Book Title of 2015, and Strangers Have the Best Candy was one of the seven books!
According to The Bookseller, “The prize was open to self-published authors for the first time in its 37-year history, and the self-published Strangers Have the Best Candy by Margaret Meps Schulte (Choose Art) completes the shortlist.”
Being on the shortlist hasn’t translated into any sales or calls from publishing houses so far. Actually winning the prize might do the trick, so here’s my shameless request: Would you please go to the voting site and cast a vote for me? It will take less than a minute, if you use this link: https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/diagramprize2014.
After that, please share this and tell your friends you know a Diagram Prize nominee! Anybody who votes for me gets a hug and a piece of candy!